Thursday, 8 December 2011

Ask me questions about online dating

Tuesday, 6 December 2011

Ask me questions about online dating profiles

Monday, 14 November 2011

I started dated this girl about 9 months ago, a month in she tells me she escorted. I'm in love with her but for some reasons when I look at her all I picture is another dude inside her its horrible and killing me! what do I do?

Most people have a sexual you think this way with women in general (ie picture other 'dudes' inside her) or is her sexual past only an issue because of her job as an escort? I personally don't see why you should view it differently to a girl who has multiple partners that hasn't escorted. It's in her past and she's been very open with you. If you care for her and want to make it work you need to put her past job where it should be - in the past, and move forwards. It's not very nice for her if you are thinking about her with other men when you are having sex with her, because I can guarentee she won't be thinking about her past clients when she's having sex with you - she will be thinking about you.

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Thursday, 10 November 2011

Do you consider yourself to be happier now than when you were escorting? Also interested to know how you define happiness, and what you think the key ingredients are to achieving it, from your own experiences. Are sex, money & 'success' key ingredients?

I am generally a very happy person, and when I was escorting yes I was happy with my profession, and I am equally happy now on my exciting journey since I finished escorting. Everyone has different values/desires you can't define one formular that will make everyone happy because everyone is different.

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Tuesday, 8 November 2011

have you ever had sex so bad that when you were done you thought (or said out loud) "why did i bother?"

yup, but also had some great sex too so it balances out

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Which of Santa's lists would you prefer to be on naughty or nice?

naughty for sure. my mum still makes us stockings. bless :) they're not naughty though we get satsumas, nuts, socks and little toys lol

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Saturday, 22 October 2011

Wednesday, 19 October 2011

My theory is that she offloads all of her guilt on to me and she uses me to give her a alibi, when in fact she's meeting up with her lover! I'm friends with her foremost but I don't want to get caught up in her lies. Should I subtly end our friendship?

if you still want to be friends tell her you are no longer going to be her alibi, will not cover for her and you don't want to hear anything about her cheating or problems with her husband - however from what you have said she sounds quite selfish, so maybe ending subtly would be best. you don't want her to drag you down with her problems because from what you have said it seems like a one way friendship

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I've recently joined a dating website and stated I want a relationship but responses from men are clearly after 1 thing!I've been on 2 dates and their profile/pictures looked great but in real life nothing like their profiles. Where an I going wrong?!

let me guess... plenty of fish? are you paying? if you don't pay for dating sites then you won't have any serious people looking to date... that goes for the free option on match too. have you tried ?

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Tuesday, 18 October 2011

A work colleague whom I also socialise with outside of work has confided in me that she's having an affair. She blames her husbands lack of interest in her for the reason why. Her husband is a good friend of mine.should I tell him or keep my mouth shut?!

sounds like she wants you to tell him! why on earth would she tell you if she knows you're friends with him? Hmmm, difficult one. these things can end up back firing and you can be painted as the bad guy. I'd tread carefully. are you closer to him or her?

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Hi Rebecca. Do you relationship advice for girls as well as guys? I often get my female friends asking me for advice and at times I really struggle what to tell them!

having worked prodominently with men for about 13 years I know lot about them, so yes I can certainly advise women. what sort of questions do you get asked?

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Do you miss the 'buzz' of being an escort, and having sex on a regular basis? I guess if you are happy within yourself, you don't really need the 'buzz' or constant sex. Has it taken a while for you to adjust in how you relate to people?

I didn't get a buzz from the sex but the lifestyle gave me a buzz, and yes sometimes I miss that. I went without sex for a year and half when i finished escorting. I enjoy sex very much, but I wanted to prove to myself that i could go without. I don't get enjoyement from one night stands there has to be a deeper connection there.

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when you get negative comments or "hate" from someone, do you find it easier to easier to brush away comments that come from men or women?

haters are haters male or female makes no difference, I don't let them bother me, haters make me stronger :)

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Monday, 3 October 2011

Guys send me your dating/relationship/women questions for top advice from your Uk dating coach

many dating sites prohibit users from posting information like e-mail addressed and in some cases even real names. if you've joined a site but don't want to pay to be a long-term, or even short term, subscriber, do you advocate trying to skirt this rule?

no I don't advise skirting this rule, it's there for a reason - to protect people. There's lots of weirdos out there.

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You said that being an ex-escort puts men off. Personally, I've only ever had sex with prostitutes, so a prostitute girlfriend or wife would be perfect for me. Don't give up, there must be loads of men who like prostitutes so much, they want to marry one.

I'm very happy and content as I am. many friends that I had in the biz were married or had partners that were supportive of their job. I no longer escort and have a number of exciting projects on the go. Everyone has a past and skeletons in the closet, it's just mine are in the open :)

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Monday, 5 September 2011

What's your favorite saying?

I gotta a few, here's some of my faves....
'we are a creation of our own mind' - Buddah
'you snooze you lose' - random
'he who dares Rodney, he who dares' Only Fools and Horses :D

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Are you still practising aikido? i think we were in class together at the beginning but I stopped after a few classes. James here. What ryu are you now?

yes. I'm doing my black belt now, but I've done my ankle in so haven't been training for a month or so :(

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Tuesday, 30 August 2011

read your blog post of aug. 7. while i consider myself a positive person, i've also been shy & introverted at times. how do you keep a woman's initial interest if you're not a naturally boisterous or talkative person?

be interested and interesting. Genuine interest will keep a woman attentive, and then she's doing most of the talking :) It's one of the biggest mistakes men make, they are simply not interested enough in a woman; getting to know her and finding out what she's about. we can all be shy and introverted sometimes, it's nothing to concern yourself with - especially because you say you are only that way some of the time.

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Do you think couples speak too much in a relationship. Get themselves tied in knots cos of it. And get worried when they've nothing to say. When words aren't really what is required. Just being with each other in the situation is very often enough.

So sorry I have just seen I din't reply to this. I've just moved house so I'm still catching up with things :) no i think couples don't speak enough, and aren't clear with their communication. Signs/actions and words are all misread/misunderstood. Great book to read is the Five Love Languages :)

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Sunday, 7 August 2011

you've been going out with someone for a short amount of time you like each other, but haven't had sex yet... every time you suggest dinner, a pub or music club to get to know her better, she suggests going dancing or partying... what to do?

is there equal physical attraction on both sides? How far have you gone with each other? are you sure that your intentions are clear and she's not thinking of you as a 'friend'?

There are some girls that abuse the generosity of guys that they know fancy them and will string them along when it suits them. If they need lifts, someone to hang out with, someone to take them out for drinks/food etc... Be careful that this isn't your situation.

She's calling the shots and you're doing whatever she wants to do - she sounds a bit selfish to me. Read my blog post about being the leader... and turn the tables, don't agree to go where she wants to go. You need to be assertive and pull back the reins.

Women/people in general don't respect people who are pushovers. You have a right to do things you want to do, and if she doesn't want to do them, find someone else. You will know if she is abusing your generosity if she refuses to do the things you want to do. It could just be that she's a party girl and that's who she is, so you either accept her for that or move on. Are you driving her to these parties? If so go back to my earlier comment above!

Also I think you will find this post relevant/interesting, as it lays out what women want...

I hope this helps :)

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Wednesday, 3 August 2011

I am dating a lady that I intially met as an escort. Shortly afterwards we started dating and she told me she loved me...Now I have fallen in love with her. What are your experiences and your suggestions for two people that are in love that initiallty met

I know of clients that have met their girlfriend/partners through escorting. Sometimes it works sometimes it doesn't. Most guys can't handle the girl still escorting. Usually they want them to stop escorting and that's when there's problems. Girls escorting generally like to earn their own money, and have a good standard of living, so they may find it hard to be a 'kept woman' so to speak, where they aren't escorting, but aren't earning their own money, so relying 100% on a man to provide for them. My advice would be to put no pressure on her to stop, either accept her as she is an an escort or walk away. She will stop in her own time, if/when she is ready to do so. It must be her choice.

Not knowing either of you, I can't really offer any personal advice, but I wish you all the very best, and I hope it works out for you. Do feel free to write if you have any more specific questions :)

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Wednesday, 6 July 2011

would you consider a guy/girl undateable if they didn't like the same music you did?

not at all. However i have a very broad music taste from Metalica, to Dolly Parton, from Eminem to Tina Turner :)

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Friday, 27 May 2011

to the women i am friends with, i'm usually the guy they complain to about their asshole boyfriends when i inevitably hear "why can't i find a guy just like you?" how do i get them to dump their asshole boyfriends and choose me?

women are with a**holes because they choose to be. Not all women want a**holes, but those that do are with them because they make that choice. They wouldn't ever go out with you because you're not the type of guy they like. There are plenty of women, myself included that wouldn't put up with guys being a**holes.

Why not look for the women who like guys that treat them with respect rather than the ones that don't?

Everyone enjoys moaning, especially in the Uk :) but if these women were that unhappy they would leave these guys. I don't have any time or sympathy for people that moan about a situation and do nothing to change it. I want someone with a bit of back bone, someone that won't put up with any cr*p. These women are weak and lack self respect, if they choose to be in a relationship where they are unhappy. Some people just enjoy moaning, and these women are like that - not happy unless they're unhappy :D

Look for women who like good men who respect them and not bad boys :)

You need to look at why you are drawn to those types of women. If I were you, that would be my concern (NOT why the women didn't want you), and look at how you can change yourself to attract the right sort of women. That's my advice, I hope it helps.

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You seem very pretty, in more ways than one. From what I have seen and read about you. What are you looking for in a relationship, and how do you meet potentially suitable guys? If your criteria matches my 'profile', I'd like to ask you out on a date.

Thank you for your offer and compliments (I do get asked via social media to meet guys and to go on dates) however it's not something I would ever do. Sorry. The guys I date are people that I meet in my day to day life.

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It is sometimes said that men think about only two things most of the time. Money & sex. But when they get them they always want more. Never satisfied. What do you think the solution is? Could men benefit from thinking more like women?

ooo that's a tough question :/ If we all knew the answer to that I guess there would be no infidelity (from men anyway :) I think the only way to make people realise that greed in any form is distructive is to give them the shock factor, and show them how little some other people have. Ie charity work in third world countries... although i'm not sure how that would work for sex :/ When people get greedy they lose all rationality and sensibility and become selfish, and it's difficult to reach out to people and to get any understanding from them when they are like this.

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Do you practice what you preach, in advising people who are looking for a relationship the best way to go about it? Or do you have your own 'approach'?

My advice about dating is for men, so I learn a lot from the way men approach me, and the men I dated as an escort :) My new date coaching website will be up and running in the next few weeks, so watch this space :)

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Has escorting put you off seeking a relationship with 'the right person'? i.e. all men have the potential to stray off the beaten path. Do you think men know what love is, and what a relationship means?

I find it sad and patronising that people think the way you do (many men share the same view as you). I don't mean to offend, but it's frustrating. I had relationships when I was escorting, and I will have relationships in the future. No not every man is a cheater, and yes like every other human being I have the capacity to love. It's such a shame that men assume that every woman that has worked as an escort must be missing the ability to love, cherish, and trust a man. Yes some women get damaged working as an escort, but then there's lots of things that damage a person - physical and mental abuse. I kept my head above water whilst I escorted, and have maintained being a very loving and giving person.

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Friday, 20 May 2011

With all this talk about celebs, gagging orders & keeping their names out of papers. From your ex client list anybody famous who might be worried now since you've become known in the public eye lol !

Interesting question. I'm sure my ex clients won't be outing me - I'm already 'self' outed, and I wouldn't out them, so I think we're safe :D There was a goverment official that was outed by the papers that I wrote about in my book. Cheeky begger tried to rip me off, but I got my money back and he ended up in jail (nothing to do with me btw lol). One of personal fave stories from my book :) what goes around comes around

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Are you still there? You're not answering my questions, gorgeous.

to be honest I'm bored of talking about sex and penises. Sorry! If you can think of something interesting to ask that isn't about sex and sexual body parts, then I'll happily answer :)

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Friday, 13 May 2011

What makes for the most heavenly cunnilingus?

long, slow, gentle, consistent, light pressure

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As you prefer circumcised, would you have the operation performed on your sons, should you have any?

hell no! thats child abuse. I believe it should be a choice

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Do you prefer that your men be fully shaved? Are you?

no - trimmed

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Please elaborate on why you prefer circumcised. Does it affect the feeling of penetrative sex?

cleaner and smoother. It is only a preference. Out of my long term boys only one was circumcised. No it doesn't affect the feel of penetrative sex

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Wednesday, 11 May 2011

I was asking in the context of men/woman & agree with your comments. I lost my true soulmate some years ago in this way & there is not a week that goes by without me having some special memories of her. My life was empty without her. But you do move on

yes its a shame when it happens like that. I lost a very special friend when he couldn't deal with the fact we would never be an item. It's sad for both people. I wish you good health and happiness x

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Tuesday, 10 May 2011

Do you think platonic relaionships really work ?

All my relationships are currently platonic. When you say 'work' what do you mean? I don't understand in what context you are asking. We have a relationship of sorts with family/friends/work colleagues.

If you mean between men and women - they 'work' if both can accept the platonic relationship, however more often than not their is one that fancies the other and if that's not reciprocated, it can be a challenging relationship in the terms of friendship/relationship. I hope this answers your question.

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Sunday, 8 May 2011

When you date now does being an 'ex escort' cause any reservations from your dates & what is the normal reaction from them

I am losing faith in men! Lol. And that's because for some reason as soon as people find out about my past (it's difficult to be discreet now I am promoting a book and new businesses where my past experiences give me expertise) their whole opinion of me changes. I watch it happen in some peoples faces. I don't tell guys on a first date, and try to hold off for at least a couple of dates because I don't want people to judge me.

Recently this year I've been on a few dates, and they have been very disappointing. The people that I have eventually had any sort of intimacy with that know what my past job entailed, don't treat me as a human being, as a lady, or with any sort of respect.

I actually enjoyed fooling around in bed on my escort dates more, and the men respected me more as an escort than the men I meet now I am out of it. How sad is that? Btw... no I'm not tempted to escort again! *in case you were wondering :)*

Guys I date assume that they are entitled to have sex with me, because it was my job, so I must be there for their pleasure/entertainment.

I think some men are intimidated by my past job, but really I am just a normal country bumpkin girl, who's very caring and loving.

When I find the right person they will see past the job I did for ten years, and accept and respect me for the loyal, genuine person I am today.

So I'm going to forget the whole dating thing for now and concentrate on my businesses.

Maybe I'll become a nun ;-p

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Do you have any plans. Beyond our business. Or do you focus on what you are doing right now as much as possible. Without any regrets about the past, or worries about the future. ?

Beyond 'our business'?? I'm not sure what that means I'm not in business with anyone. I am focussing on my new businesses and very much enjoying the journey and new challenges. I don't have any regrets, but some worries about my future. Mainly I worry if I will find a guy to settle down with who is open minded and doesn't hold my past against me - someone that sees me for the genuine person I am, and who doesn't define me by my 'escort past'.

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Thursday, 31 March 2011

Just found out my girlfriend is an escort, she hid this from me so I've dumped her I can't even stomach looking at her and never will. Just waiting for the HIV test now yay. So what do you think of women who escort and try and date at the same time?

If you have any further concerns or want any advice about getting your head around what has just happened, please feel free to email me via my website. I'd be more than happy to help.

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Just found out my girlfriend is an escort, she hid this from me so I've dumped her I can't even stomach looking at her and never will. Just waiting for the HIV test now yay. So what do you think of women who escort and try and date at the same time?

Please don't worry about the HIV test. Escorts are some of the cleanest ladies around. I am confident you will be fine. I never had an std in 9 years working as an escort. I was honest with all of my boyfriends. I had 3 long term relationships. I think any sort of deceit is wrong and I'm sorry that she did it behind your back. In her defence I can only say that she may have deeply cared for you/loved you, and didn't want to lose you, so she kept it a secret. Not the right thing to do,but the longer you leave a secret/lie then the harder it is to tell the truth. I can completely understand that men don't want to date escorts, but it is a job, and nothing more than that. It does take a special sort of guy to date an escort, and that's no disrespect to those that wouldn't. Why don't you have a read of my book The Girlfriend Experience? I think it will help you understand why women chose this profession. I know of many escorts that are married and in relationships and their men are fully aware and accept what they do. One of my ex'es said he could never go out with an escort, then after hanging out with him for a couple of weeks, he got to know me as a person, I spoke about my work and explained to him that people got my body but not 'me'. For me to be inimate with someone and genuinely enjoy it, there needs to be an emotional connection. Eventually he understood that. Our intimacy time was special and I cherished it. o in the end he didn't judge me by my work, and ended up saying he could easily fall in love with me, and we did fall in love.

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Tuesday, 29 March 2011

You specialised in overnight bookings and long weekends with clients. Many requests for such expensive bookings tend to be from fantasists rather than genuine clients. How did you screen out the timewasters?

Over time it became easy to spot time wasters from their emails or a short phone conversation. Generally my weekend bookings and longer engagements came from people I had seen before. I always took deposits for anything over an overnight, and this cut out time wasters. I am offering a coaching service by phone or email for ladies who want to become escorts, you might find my services on this page useful...

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Saturday, 12 March 2011

Hi Bea - Thanks for a very interesting book! Couldnt put it down and read it in a few days! :) Have been thinking of escorting myself and thought I'd read your book to get some insight into the "real" world of escorting. Thanks for sharing ur experiences!

thank you for your feedback, I am so pleased you enjoyed my book. How did you hear about it? So what did you decide after reading my book? I am now offering escort mentoring/coaching and I'm surprised at how much interest there is, so if you do want to start and need some help and advice, do take a look here at the services I offer...

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Would like to ask you about your new "platonic escort" service. Does this really work? Have been thinking of it myself but is there really a demand for this? Seem to be able to find only rather tacky websites out there that offer this.. Thanks. Ziggy

I very, very rarely get platonic dates, so don't give up your day job lol :) There are some, but guess it's easier for me as I already had the traffic going to my site, but to start from scratch, I'm not sure. And I'm guessing you're a guy, so once again, I'm not sure of what it's like for men. You'll need to ask guys that offer platonic dates. I would imagine there is more of a service for men offering platonic dates than there is for women. I don't know of any agencies/listing sites that advertise platonic dates. Sorry I can't be of more help.

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